Have you ever felt like this? It just seems like you cannot get ahead. You take one step forward to take two steps back. It seems like one hardship after another comes again and again... a never-ending cycle. That is where I am in my life. And I am wrestling with God on this issue.
In Kim's and my life, it all started 15 years ago.
I became very sick (still struggling today). Then we had Tyler... Tyler was a wonderful child, but he pushed Kim and I to our limits. After 18 years of pouring everything we could into this child he took his life.
Life went on.
After Tyler we had to foreclose on our house, moved to a great area. Then as soon as my health was showing some improvements Kim was diagnosed with MS. I was in so much disbelief that when the Dr. told us I just laughed. Now as we are getting Kim's MS under control, it looks like we are headed for another large change... again. I am tired!
So, what I am to do?
I know that God did not create me to be this miserable. So, is it me and the way I perceive my hardships, or is God really after me?
I will share was God is telling me.
I am expecting to live in a pain free world.... it does not exist.
When I look back on my life, yes these were hard times, but God was/is always there. He always carried me through these hard time... and I know He is not going to stop now.
I have to learn to be happy where I am in life (Yes, it is hard). Trust God, as Kim said we could wake up tomorrow and one of us could be gone.... I would have wasted all that time worrying and not enjoyed what God has given me.
God has given me this verse; it is from Paul.
God's Provision
I rejoiced in the Lord greatly that now at length you have revived your concern for me. You were indeed concerned for me, but you had no opportunity. Not that I am speaking of being in need, for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content. I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need. I can do all things through him who strengthens me.
Philippians 4:10-13
You see Paul learned the secret of being happy in ANY situation.... JESUS!
Are you letting your hardship destroy your life? Are you not claiming the joy that rightfully belongs to you?
Written by Jim Bushmiller
My prayers are very, very much with you and your wife. I'll praying my heart out. I don't know why things like this happen but you are doing good to go to God!
ReplyDeleteIt's all of this and then... to see folks who wouldn't give God one thought...flourishing and enjoying life. I love God and will not waver but I would love for our situations as children of God to turn around.
ReplyDeleteSeasons in life some r so very hard, mine has eased up. But for awhile it literally was this, I would go through something and be on what I thought was the end when another hardship was thrown my way..never a break or a breather..I kept saying I just need time to breathe..I finally had to take 6 weeks off the job I had due the stress was causing my blood pressure to skyrocket to stroke level..during those 6 wks I clung to God like he was my life boat one of the verses in psalm 23 says he restores my soul, one version of it said I am giving u time to breathe..u and your wife have gone through many tests and u r still standing by the grace and mercy of God...keep running to him and hold on tight for the Lord is our strength, our source our salvation and when the time is right he will give u time to breathe..
ReplyDeleteI so appreciate this post and I truly try to trust and believe and have spent most of my life this way, but with my latest challenges, I struggle mostly with the fact that I am still alone in all of this. For many reasons I could never marry when I was younger and now, that I am in my later years with no children or partner, I find it is increasingly hard to wonder if I did something to offend God. I know even if I were married I could lose a partner, but I have never had a partner and miss that so much. Thank you again for sharing.
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